A question for 'U
From the Winter 2001 Parent Newsletter
By Rod Loper, University Counseling & Consulting Services.
Dr. Roper has retired, but Scott Slattery now addresses questions
from parents and guardians of University of Minnesota students. Please
address your questions to Dr. Slattery at 612-625-4568, or e-mail
slatt008@umn.edu.
Q: My daughter
is a freshman. She has always been very active—an athlete and
class officer in high school—but she doesn't seem to be very
happy in college. Although she gets along well with her roommate,
she says she doesn't have any real friends yet. She seems more depressed
than I've ever seen her. What should we be doing?
A: This is a very
good question. Your daughter could be experiencing any number of
things, ranging from ordinary homesickness to clinical depression.
Sometimes, in my counseling with students like your
daughter, the client discovers that she has forgotten all those
activities that made life exciting before she got here. Demands
of coursework and the transition to college may take center stage
and put athletics and group activities on the "back burner." Avoiding
rewarding activities can lead to depression and boredom unless
we remember to "dance with the guy that brought me to the party."
There are loads of opportunities on campus to be
an athlete or a student leader. Through Recreational Sports, intramural
sports teams and club sports are always looking for former high
school athletes. Community and service learning are encouraged
by several colleges. Your daughter might want to start in her own
residence hall by checking out leadership possibilities with the
community adviser on her floor. Remind her that she may need to
realize that things here are different from what she's used to,
but not that different.
She has valid needs that are not being met, leaving
life rather bland. Remind her that higher education involves educating
the whole person.
If this doesn't help, suggest she talk with a counselor
in Eddy or Coffey hall. For more information or for an appointment,
students can call 612-624-3323. |
